I will cut off your left arm and your right leg with an old rusty hacksaw and then tie together your remaining arm and leg with a bundle of leather cords to form a kind of gruesome er111a meat doughnut. Then I will to take an over-sized meat hook tied to a rope and pierce down behind your collarbone and hook it around until it exits right underneath your scapula. Then I will throw you in a pit of starved adolescent mako sharks and play a fun little game of 'go fish'. Remember, makos usually attack their prey towards the tail, and eat up to 5% of their body-weight per day...so it'll be an especially entertaining game. Edit: If that wasn't a cue to start being evil (aka bustier) then I'm not sure what is...
I am wearing the bustier now. The evilness has been activated. For the record, I'm going to have some difficulty getting the words "gruesome er111a meat doughnut" out of my mind. Extraordinary turn of phrase, that.
All I'm trying to say is, once I'm done with er111a, you won't be able to differentiate him from an alpaca sack full of hairy strawberry ice cream*. [size=-2]*credit goes to Joseph Heller[/size]
Uh oh. The quotes from famous literature have begun. Now, we're in trouble. This is going to turn into a bit of a Catch-22 if we're not careful...
"She had a pretty gift for quotation, which is a serviceable substitute for wit." -Maugham (1941) "Everything I say is quote-worthy, you should start taking notes." -AlexeiRoquentin (just now) Those are the only two quotes I know. :|